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Posts Tagged ‘Humor’

In losing you, I turned around
And looked for solace
Looked for peace

I looked at sunsets longer
And admired the colors
For about five minutes, then I got bored.

At the beach, I lingered nearer the shore
To feel the ocean spray on my face
And came home with tangled hair, I hated that.

I lit incense sticks
Let the smoke swirl around me
Then my allergies kicked in.

I walked the dog more often
Walked him longer
He hated that, he just wanted to go home.

I looked into people’s eyes
Instead of just looking at them
It creeped everyone out.

I went looking for answers
Spent hours surfing the Net
And got addicted to gaming.

I tried my hand at poetry
But since “love” doesn’t rhyme with much
I gave up on that kind of verse.

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Transiting moon is well within conjunction orb of my natal Jupiter and Chiron as I write this. So clearly we’re dealing with hurt feelings and, in my case, I’ve decided to vent them on Jupiter. Fatso natally trines my sun and I’m usually a pretty happy person. But happy, sunny, jovial people have their dark days, too, and this is mine.

If you’ve been into astrology long enough, or even if you’ve gone only a little beyond the basic sun signs, you’ll have heard people oh-and-ah about Jupiter. The Great Benefic, he’s traditionally know as. Really? Did y’all read the fine print? And there’s a lot of fine print, easily missed, when you’re looking at Jupiter. Check this out:

Easy aspects: Do not quit your day job just based on a trine or sextile made by transiting Jupiter. Jupiter transits promote optimism and good feelings. But they don’t help you get off your butt and go out there and achieve something. Jupiter’ll tell you, “You don’t need this grief, babe. Quit your job, hang out with me. We’ll go places, see people. It’ll be fun.” And it will be just as he promises: you’ll have a ball. But, alas, all parties come to an end and so will yours.

Then, the purple-favoring one will wave a cheery goodbye as he goes off to hang out with someone else. And you’ll be left there alone, cleaning the mess that your joint revelries created. Did I also mention that you would be hungover? And broke?

Your best bet with a good transit is to keep your head on your shoulders while enjoying the natural high he brings you. And if he does bless you with unexpected opportunities, and to be fair, he will, then call on Saturn and Mars so that you can make something out of them.

Jupiter or Bonzo?Not-so-easy aspects: The conjunctions and squares are described as harsh or active aspects and if Jupiter is making them natally or by transit, then Bonzo the Happy Clown is no competition for you. ‘Cause you’re funnier than him, louder than him, your jokes are more risqué and the odds that you play are bigger.

Whoo-hoo!

Ever notice that “whoo-hoo” rhymes with “boo-hoo”? Now you know why! Two of the people I hang out with most have Jupiter squares and oppositions natally and they’re great fun to be with. But they’re constantly pushing their luck and frequently falling on their butts. They ignore rules and facts and just blithely go their merry way, doing what they want to do. Now, I’m all for be-yourself-do-your-thing-be-happy; but our optimistic duo brush aside reminders that decisions should be tempered with a little dose of Saturnian restraint and homage to ground realities. Without that, people oftentimes make bad decision and attract negative results. So, of late, I’ve found myself shaking my fist at Jupiter as I once again bail these two Jupe babies out of whatever fine mess they’ve landed in.

So the next time Jupiter rolls by promising fun and fortune, don’t forget, he’s a  gas giant. Now you know where the expression “full of hot air” comes from.

Disclaimer: Currently, transiting Jupiter is squaring and opposing this writer’s personal planets. Since it is also retrograde, something she thought looked just great is turning out to be not quite the picnic she expected. So keep that in mind when you read this, especially the part about “hot air.”

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