I’m currently studying secondary progressions and still haven’t started the classes on relationships and the progressed chart. So bear that in mind when you read what I’ve written below.
Last evening, a friend and I were discussing markers for marriage in the progressed chart. So I looked at my progressed chart for the day I got married: my progressed sun was a degree away from the natal DSC. There were other indicators as well, in both our charts; along with ties in both the natal and the progressed. You could say I was fated to marry at that time. Eventually, my pDSC will hit pUranus and that is fate as well. Admittedly, it’s up to my spouse and me how we deal with that future turbulence. It may end well or it may end badly, but come it will. And for me, it would have come no matter who I had married.
It’s our internal design that attracts the people who come to us; and again it is our internal design, progressed over time, that determines how these relationships play out. That’s a sobering thought because it leaves no room for playing the blame game. The same is true with the natal chart. There are clear markers for the kind of marriage someone is going to have. Every marriage has some important keywords, some predominant themes and these are clearly writ in the natal chart. They would be true for you no matter who you married.
We are tied to people who become part of our history in intricate ways and these ties are visible when you look at two people’s synastry. We worry so much about meeting the right people, marrying the right person. The more I look at charts, the more I think there is no need to worry, if someone is going to be a part of your destiny, they will be drawn to you as you will be to them.
Not all relationships last a lifetime. A few friendships, if we’re lucky. But it’s mostly our family ties, whether by blood or marriage, that really endure. But there are transient relationships that leave their mark on us: a friendship that springs at work, a writing friend you’ve never met, or a neighbor you had in a city where you used to live a long time ago. I’ve been looking at such charts in my own life and I’ve been finding the most striking connections in the progressed charts. In all cases, predictably, there are links in the natals as well. But it’s the progressed ties that have really grabbed my attention. Some examples: A friend I’ve never met has his pMC on the same degree as my natal ASC and it’s looking likely that we’ll be meeting soon for the first time. Another new friend has his pDCS conjunct my natal ASC. These are people I’ve encountered recently, and the mirroring of the axes make me wonder if we meant to meet at this time.
In fact, one of them is a religious writer and yesterday we were discussing that the deeper you go into religion or astrology, the more you are brought face-to-face with the unknown. Yes, there is some kind of a grand design, there are people you are fated to meet and perhaps fated to lose. It reminds me of these lines from one of Anne Stevenson’s poems:
The way lives touch touch and spring apart,
the pulse synaptic, local, but its stretch electric